The Power of Perception

Below is an e-mail I recently received from some friends.  It is a true story based on a Washington Post social experiment organized in 2007 about perception, taste and people's priorities. 



Washington, DC Metro Station on a cold January morning in 2007 a man walks to a corner of the station pulls out his violin and begins to play.   The man with the violin played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time approx. 2 thousand people went through the station, most of them on their way to work. After 3 minutes a middle aged man noticed there was a musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds and then hurried to meet his schedule.
4 minutes later: The violinist received his first dollar: a woman threw the money in the hat and, without stopping and continued to walk.


6 minutes later: A young man leaned against the wall to listen to him, then looked at his watch and started to walk again.
10 minutes: A 3-year old boy stopped but his mother tugged him along hurriedly. The kid stopped to look at the violinist again, but the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk, turning his head all the time. This action was repeated by several other children. Every parent, without exception, forced their children to move on quickly.
45 minutes: The  musician played continuously.  Only 6 people stopped and listened for a short while. About 20 gave money but continued to walk at their normal pace.  The man collected a total of $32.
1 hour: He finished playing and silence took over. 
  
The violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the greatest musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written, with a violin worth $3.5 million dollars. Two days before Joshua Bell sold out a theater in Boston where the seats averaged $100.


I was blown away by this article not just amazed at how many people missed out on this 'free concert' but in thinking that I too might have missed out.

In my research about this experiment,  I stumbled upon on a few posts about it--a few people expressed frustration about the experiment.   Their view was if people knew it was a free concert they would have stopped but because no one told them they had things they had to do in their lives.  THAT is EXACTLY the point.  Absolutely, tell people they are getting something for free and they would stop, just for the mere fact they are getting something for free or because they are seeing a famous musician.  But when walking through a crowded subway station headed to your next meeting or event and you hear beautiful music playing by a perceived street musician, do you stop?  Do you take time out of your day to listen and enjoy? Or do you keep moving?

One woman did stop--at the end of the video you can see her standing there and then she says, 'only in DC would this happen' she loved the music, stopped to listen and then recognized the musician.  Had she not followed her instincts to stop when she heard the music she would have missed out on enjoying a serenade by one of the world's top musicians--free or not.

How many opportunities like this do we miss in a day, the chance to talk to a stranger/friend, listening to our partner's story about his/her day, hearing our children laugh, watching a beautiful sunset.

I am always amazed how on vacation the sunset becomes a giant part of the day--each day on vacation we watched for the sunset, in fact a large crowd gathers to watch the sunset.  Makes sense, we are all on vacation, we are all of the mindset of relaxing and enjoying our time.  However, at home, we rarely watch the sunset--granted these days it is hard to see with all the clouds.  When we get home, we have things to do, people to see and the sunset becomes lost in the shuffle.  In reality, the sunset happens at home the same as it does on vacation.  So I was surprised and touched when my nearest and dearest said to me one of the favorite parts of his job is from his window he can watch the sunset each day.  That is what this story reminds us of:  Little moments happen every day that we might just miss because we are too busy or because we perceive them as insignificant.

So today my challenge to you is to follow your gut--listen for the beautiful music, the touching story or the heartfelt laughter that makes up your day and then stop and enjoy it!!!

If you are interested, here is the original article in the Washington Post.

Live Happier Tip: Get out of your comfort zone

Lately I have been trying to market my practice more both on-line (by writing more blog posts) and within the community. In keeping with this effort, last night I went to my first networking event. For the record I am not a big fan of networking--I am a bit of an introvert (but admit I fake extrovert well) so I find these events doubly exhausting one because I am talking to a group of strangers and two because I am selling myself and my services. Before the event I thought of every reason possible why I didn't have to go, I was tired, it was a long day, I wouldn't REALLY make any connections etc. But I had committed to myself and to my fabulous marketing coach, Michelle Barry Franco, that I would attend this networking event. So I did--and it was hard and stressful and I had a lot of insecurities and self doubt creep up. AND I met some really great women and made some helpful connections. As I was driving home, I felt a feeling of giddiness and I realized that I what I most enjoyed about the evening was getting out of my comfort zone!! It was a bit exhilarating to try something different and challenging and stretch myself. From time to time I can get stuck in a rut--stuck in my safe place. Last night reminded me of the freedom that comes from challenging myself to try new things.

It doesn't have to be facing a major fear it just has to be stretching your comfort zone. Maybe turning off the TV (if you watch it every night), going for a run or a walk, saying hi to a new co-worker, trying a different way to work, or joining a new organization. There are a million ways to get out of our comfort zones--get out of our ruts. It is helpful to branch out, you will be amazed how trying one new thing can open you up to new possibilities and help you live happier. What are some ideas you have for stretching your comfort zone? Please Share!

Perspective

Well I have returned from South Africa--such a fabulous trip full of life lessons which I plan on sharing here over the next few weeks.

When I left on the trip I said to a friend of mine that I wanted this trip to be life changing--she then said to me "what would you want to change about your life?" At the time I couldn't come up with a response and I decided I would take that question with me to South Africa. Within the first few nights I realized the thing I wanted to change the most was worrying about stupid meaningless stuff.

Throughout my trip I was frequently reminded of the movie Grand Canyon--in the movie Danny Glover is telling Kevin Kline about his visit to the Grand Canyon and the fact that he felt because these rocks had been there for millions of years they were laughing at him and all his problems--and it helped him put his life in perspective--as he said made him realize in the spectrum of the whole world his life was small "as small as a gnat on the back of a cow when you are driving by at 60 mph" I absolutely love that quote and frequently when I am feeling overwhelmed by my life I think about it. It kept coming to me as we drove through complete poverty in many areas, or as we witnessed the ocean and the mountains. In that place and time I was able to concentrate on what really mattered to me. Does it really matter if I miss a workout, it is it really important if I forgot to pick up the dry cleaning, will my life be dramatically altered if I have no plans on a Friday night?

Perspective is an amazing thing. Looking at your life and figuring out "what really matters here"? How much time do I waste spinning out on the stuff that doesn't matter....it is a life changing realization.