South Africa

Tomorrow I am leaving for a trip to South Africa! 19 days in Cape Town. I am headed there with a group of students from a local university--I am one of the chaperons. Talk about the chance to break out of the routine--to practice intentional living! Wow! I have a lot of fears about this trip--will I be able to bond with the students? Will we be safe? Will I lose my mind on the 21 hour flight? Will I survive 19 days without contact with my friends and family back home? And yet I have a lot of excitement--what will it be like to live in a country totally different from mine? How will it feel to stretch myself WAY out of my comfort zone? What amazing people will I meet? How many wild animals will I get to see in their natural habitat?

I have found I am filled with mixed emotions--excitement and fear, dread and joy, certainty and insecurity, anxiety and confidence! All bubbling up and trying to come out and I am allowing them too--all the different emotions--to come up and out and be apart of my experience. In the past I would have tried to hide my fears or keep my joy unexpressed. However I have learned life is messy--life is gray and mixed up. It isn't clear and direct and learning how to express that uncertainty is a gift we can give ourselves. So I am trying to be intentional in my experience and my emotions. To let bubble up whatever bubbles up and live this trip to the fullest! Next time I write I will have returned from my trip and will have many more adventures to share!! Peace.

Back to Basics

This week my electricity went out due to a wind storm. For 30+ hours I didn't have any power. What a great reminder of not only my dependency on electricity but also how filled with 'activity' my life has become. When I arrived home at hour 20 of no electricity just before sundown I ran frantically around the house gathering candles and flashlights and preparing for a cold night in the dark. Then I gathered all my candles in one spot, pulled up my chair and sat for 2 hours and read my book. Two hours of reading!!! I couldn't check my computer, couldn't watch TV. It was too dark to clean the kitchen or clean my closet. I could just sit in one spot with my candles huddled under my blanket with my cat on my lap and read! What a fabulous gift. It made me realize I need to get back to basics--I need to plan regular 'black outs' into my schedule. Period of time when I just CANNOT use my computer or watch TV or be productive. Time when I am forced to sit and read or sit and breath or just sit!!! Try it--Take one evening a week/a month when you and your family are forced to just be--no TV, no cleaning, no computer, no accomplishments--just intentionally being together.